Nutrisystem’s Abysmal Requirements for Their Dietary Counselors

My e-mail to Nutrisystem after being removed from their program for no good reason.:

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From the Nutrisystem info online re: job qualifications:
https://www.smartrecruiters.com/Nutrisystem/73924945-weight-loss-counseling

Qualifications

Qualifications (include Education and specific Experience)

  • Bachelor’s Degree preferred, Associates Degree minimum.
  • Knowledge of nutrition, fitness, health, and weight loss maintenance preferred.
  • Computer Skills: Knowledge of MS Office and use of internet.
  • Capable of navigating multiple resources at one time to assist with customer concerns.
  • Able to professionally correspond with customers via verbal and written communication.
SO, a non-specific degree in any field, “preferred” knowledge of nutrition and health is the bar set by Nutrisystem for weight loss counselors.  NO actual requirement to be in the nutrition field- just some random bachelor’s or associate’s degree.  A music major could have been the one who booted me from Nutrisystem for being proactive in my own health.
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Fact-  I’ve been an RN since 1985, and owner of this body since 1963.
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Fact-  I asked for nutritional stats to monitor protein levels since I also have to ADD more protein on the plan and want to make sure it stays consistent.
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Fact-  My doctor knows I was on Nutrisystem, and had no issues with it (I’m essentially housebound from unrelated physical disabilities, so going back for a “permission slip” to be on NS, like an 8 year old, isn’t feasible)
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Fact-  I do not have chronic kidney disease, or even renal insufficiency
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Fact-  I do not see a nephrologist for ongoing issues- had a ONE TIME consult, where I was told that hydration issues related to reflux were likely causing the lab abnormalities; at the time my recent  lab was drawn in the late afternoon, I hadn’t had as much water as I usually do- but generally get fluids in. A subsequent CT (different doctor, different issue) showed no kidney problems structurally.  I have since rescheduled appointments for early morning to allow more convenient fluid intake (not looking for bathrooms away from home).
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Fact-  I am responsible for my own body and health.
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Fact-  my microalbumin level is fine (I’m diabetic, so it’s monitored regularly – NOT because there is an existing problem with my kidneys)
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Fact-  I paid for a product, not for someone who doesn’t have any background in medical issues or even a dietary degree,  outside of some blanket policy that penalizes the person  for being proactive in their own health care, to AVOID chronic kidney issues. How is that helpful?
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Fact-  I do not have any conditions that Nutrisystem lists as reasons to exclude me (so I was discriminated against based on ????).
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Fact-  I chose Nutrisystem because of the nutritional quality of the food, not to do something to jeopardize my health (which I know about. Nutrisystem does not).
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Fact-  this e-mail will be copied and pasted repeatedly until I am given a SOLID reason for being booted from using Nutrisystem BY Nutrisystem.**  What precautions do you have for those who buy Nutrisystem at Walmart, on eBay, or other sources?   You discriminate blindly and randomly only through the Nutrisystem site.

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Fact:   I love to blog
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I was booted from Nutrisystem for asking for nutritional stats on foods BECAUSE I have to add more protein on the program than what is just in their meals, and wanted it consistent.  People can walk into Walmart, buy NS foods on eBay, and there is no oversight (also no real selection for frozen foods- the boxed assortments have things I don’t like, and don’t include the things I do like).  It’s just fine for those who Nutrisystem says are not allowed on their program to buy things there.  But, with NO disqualifying diagnosis, I’m removed for being proactive in my own health.

Bite me, Nutrisystem.

Edit:  And TODAY, they are charging me for an order of a la  carte pizza after kicking me out yesterday.  Seriously?

** Actually, now, I don’t want any communication from Nutrisystem.  No faith in the qualifications of anybody I communicate with, so what’s the point?

Well, No More Palliative…

And I’m more than bummed in some ways, but in other ways, I’m really OK with it.  But, considering where I live, and my experiences with the medical folks here, it’s not that surprising that it’s been frustrating.  It’s been 16 days since the nurse was here to meet with me for being on palliative.  I was told that the chaplain and social worker would contact me, to set up a time to come and meet with me as well.  I haven’t heard from anyone.   When I called the nurse today, and asked to be taken off of the list, she asked if something had happened, and I basically said “Yeah- nothing!”.   She told me people had been sick.  Had I known that (COMMUNICATION), I would have understood.  Why can’t someone just let a person know that they weren’t forgotten, and someone would be in touch as soon as they could.  I can understand THAT.  Even a 15 second e-mail… that would have been enough.  I could have sent my well-wishes for the sick staff  in a reply.

At the only meeting, I was basically told that there were much sicker patients than myself, and what did I want from palliative- which sounded like I didn’t belong.  The next day on the phone, it didn’t seem to be an issue, so I didn’t bring it up.   I know there are sicker people out there- I used to take care of them !   But this isn’t a competition !   When I mentioned knowing that they had sicker patients, she said that she didn’t mean it that way… OK. that’s fine.  Good to know.   *thumbs up*

Ended up OK- should I decide later on that I want to try palliative again.  But for now, I’m on my own. Again… or is it still?   I see the gallbladder surgeon on Friday (with a completely different healthcare system in town)… once the gallbladder is out, my days with doctors will be few and far between.   Seems much safer like that, and if not safer, at least much less frustrating.

“You Look OK… “

Well, that’s great !  I’m glad I don’t look like I feel...  I’d have to worry about the dogs mistaking me for a fire  hydrant or other excretory depository.

I’m not sure what THIS looks like: 
– autonomic dysfunction: inconsistent regulation of blood pressure, heart rate, temperature
– diabetes w/complications on insulin
– degenerative joint disease (with one shoulder now having symptoms, both shoulders, both hips, and both knees involved- and no “elective” replacement surgeries because of my history of pulmonary emboli).
– degenerative disc disease, from cervical spine to sacral spine (or neck to butt)
– severe fibromyalgia
– carpal tunnel
– TMJ
– peripheral neuropathy (progressive sensory, diabetic amyotrophy)
– nocturnal epilepsy
– neurocardiogenic syncope/POTS (related to autonomic dysfunction/dysautonomia)
– GERD (fairly severe)
– epigastric hernia (vs. ventral- still getting worked up)
– sleep apnea
– diabetic nerve pain (feels like thighs are on fire, or hot needles in feet)
– defeated patient with little hope of getting anything addressed without some sort of support.

And I’m not sure how ‘visible’ my history is, either:
–  APL (acute promyelocytic leukemia)
– acute, subacute, and chronic pulmonary emboli in all three lobes of my right lung and           right pulmonary artery
–  multiple concussions
–  mild stroke
–  TIAs
–  falls
–  hydration issues
–  kidney injury (related to dehydration)
–  pyelonephritis
–  sepsis (r/t pyelonephritis, cancer, and post knee replacement UTI)
–  and I’m sure things I’m forgetting, including several surgeries.

Now add a doctor for nearly each of those, who don’t talk to each other.   I’m supposed to manage it all, AND manage the communication (or lack thereof) between doctors.   BTDT, and it ain’t working !   My job is to be a compliant patient.  But how can I be compliant when decisions are being made without any input from myself, and the doctors not communicating with each other before ragging on me?  I get to be a participant in my own life !!   If not, I can’t work with that physician/NP/PA/XYZ.   I can’t trust anybody who won’t hear MY concerns.   The first part of assessment is focusing on the issue at hand- and that includes patient concerns.  LISTEN- it’s cheap and used to be fairly standard.

Otherwise, if I’m not a part of my own healthcare, why should I go see those who have ME figured out without my participation?

 

 

 

The Ongoing Journey With Medical Cannabis

I’ve had my medical cannabis card for 6.5 weeks now.   It’s been a very educational and hopeful thing to find a natural product that makes such positive changes.  For so long, I have been tolerating life.   Now I have glimpses of actually having a better life (at least with the stuff I am taking the cannabis for).   It hasn’t been all perfect (takes some time to get the dosing right), but that’s operator error and inexperience).    For years, I didn’t believe that marijuana could have anything positive to give to the world, and wow… was I ever wrong.  

I had been cutting down one of my seizure meds because of kidney and liver issues, but had only gotten down to %50 of my usual dose, because of wide mood swings with getting off of the stuff (I’d dealt with it in the past, so knew to go slow).  With the medical cannabis, I’m off of it completely, and have cut down another anticonvulsant by %60- with no known change in the frequency of seizures (they are nocturnal, so I only know I’ve had seizures if I wake  up in the morning with the inside of my mouth chewed up).   I have only taken opiates two times in 6 1/2 weeks.  That’s it.  Before the medical cannabis, it was 3-5 days a week; the rest of the time, I just put up with the pain to avoid any sort of physical dependence or tolerance.   I’ve had chronic pain since 1995- so 23 years- and while I don’t expect to be pain free (gotta keep expectations reasonable), there has been improvement.   Also,  I am definitely  sleeping better and my mood isn’t as wonky. 

The sensation of using cannabis isn’t what I expected.  For medical cannabis patients, the goal is to find the dose that takes care of the symptoms without altering psychoactivity.  Getting ‘stoned’ is NOT the goal of medical cannabis.  It’s more like a ‘thing’ that I didn’t know I was missing, and suddenly feeling like life is more good than miserable.   With CBD oil (I use capsules and vaping more than the sublingual oil, but I have used it that way), I do feel a mild sleepiness, and I take the larger of two daily doses around supper time, so that I’m ready for bed at a decent hour.   With THC, the doses are very small.   CBD is the cornerstone of cannabis pain management.   THC is the enhancer.

Depending on the strain of cannabis, the effects are either more sedating (indica strains) or uplifting (sativa strains).  It’s %100 possible to customize pain relief with the level of relaxation desired, to make daily life less interrupted by the symptoms being medicated- or the side effects of the ‘treatment’.  With traditional pharmaceuticals, fatigue and sedation were the only options.

I have had a couple of times when I overshot the dose (homemade edibles usually), and the feeling of being ‘buzzed’ is not pleasant to me.   There is a literal, physical ‘buzzing’ sensation that isn’t painful, but noticeable.   The ability to form memories is altered- though there isn’t a sensation of being messed up.   It’s a very “aware” feeling, and initially it scared me- but it  is fairly easy to take care of with some CBD (I usually vape when I’m trying to counteract any ‘bad’ THC effects, as it acts faster than edibles).   But there is also a very relaxed feeling that is welcome after days when pain is really lousy (i.e. taking trash cans to curb, laundry, etc).   I’ve decided to buy most of my edibles because the consistency in dosing is better.

I don’t smoke.  Anything.   I used to smoke regular cigarettes, and did try a couple of puffs from a joint, but didn’t like the coughing fit that seems to be fairly standard for smoking the stuff.  I like vaping (steam, not  smoke), capsules (yep, just regular capsules), edibles ( gummies and chocolate, and an infused granola bar), sublingual sprays, concentrates and RSOs,  making my own topicals, and some homemade edibles (baked goods- easier to get the dose more consistent, at least when I’m making stuff).    I use cannabis 3-4 times a day; morning,  early afternoon, suppertime, and just before going to bed.  I don’t feel ‘altered’ with the dose that is working now.   There is no urge to jump in the car and drive all goofy.  There haven’t been a bunch of ‘munchies attacks’ (thank GOD).

Initially, it’s not cheap to use medical cannabis, since there is so much trial and error that goes on with finding the strains and doses that work the best.   I recommend saving up money (gotta take cash to the dispensary) while waiting for the medical card to show up (took me 113 days to get mine).

Bottom line:  this prior anti-weed snob is SO thankful for something that works so well, has few side effects (and those are dose dependent), and WORKS for so many things.  It’s not the evil herb that I was preached to about as a kid.   It’s not about being stoned, like I saw when I worked as a detox RN.  It’s about getting better, and having a better quality of life.   It offers hope.   It very well could be a lifesaver, as there is only so much constant pain a person can take.  I had a doctor tell me that pain doesn’t kill anybody.  Well, maybe not physiologically, but emotionally and mentally, it’s an absolute life-sucker.   I’m getting a bit of life back.

Marijuana For the Pot Virgin

First of all- and this is very important- in the world of medical marijuana, it’s not ‘weed’, or ‘pot’.   It’s medication.  This is not recreational usage. For many of us, it’s our last hope for something to help with whatever our qualifying conditions are.   We don’t “use” marijuana, we “medicate” with marijuana.    Don’t ever imply that  a medical marijuana patient is looking for a buzz.  We just want to have a life that is a  little closer to what is considered normal.    This former detox RN would never have considered medical marijuana if smoking it was my only option (though many MMJ patients get good relief with smoking their mj).

Prior to getting my MMJ card, I’d never smoked marijuana.  I’d smoked regular cigarettes on and off for many years, starting in the hospital for anorexia when I was 18.  I’d quit for a few years, then start up again.   I quit for good the day I was admitted to the hospital for blood clots in my lung, back in April 2007.   Before my dad died, he asked me if I’d ever consider using medical marijuana, and I told him that if I didn’t have to smoke it, I’d be willing to try it.  I’m glad we had that conversation.  It means a lot to me that he would understand, and be happy if I found something that made my life better… he always wanted my life to be better, and even though he’s been gone for nearly two years,  I still feel his love and hopes for my life after he was gone.

Back to what it’s like to use medical marijuana…  The biggest factor is how it’s used.  Since I’m not smoking (using combustion to burn the product), my other options are vaping (no combustion- just convective heat to produce vapor), edibles, tinctures, sprays (under the tongue),  and using it to cook with in mainstream foods (like ramen, spaghetti, etc).   I don’t want regular meals to have MMJ in them… it would waste some of the MMJ since I’m not a fan of leftovers.  I know some people sprinkle the decarboxylated flower on foods… but I’m not there yet.

My first exposure was edible infused chocolate, before bed.  One little square of a hybrid, in one brand  of commercial chocolate bar has 18mg of THC (or the part of marijuana that has psychoactive effects, depending on the dose) which was perfect.  I slept incredibly well, and while I woke up with some pain, I went back to sleep immediately instead of tossing and turning for the rest of the night.

Since this is all new, it’s common to not quite get things right.  The next night, I tried some vaping along with a different kind of chocolate… and I was zonked the next morning, and while I got up to use the bathroom, take my other meds, and get something to drink, I didn’t get UP until 2:00 p.m.   Not the goal.   But, lesson learned.

During the day, I’ve tried some of the sativa strains (which are different than the indica, or hybrids).   Sativas are more ‘perky’…. my favorite edible for this is the gummy candies.  They have THC, but I had no “high” at all, but did have some relief from some pain during the day.    There are SO many strains.  Check out Leafly.com for more info on the hundreds of strains of marijuana.

I’ve also been using CBD oil for months, which enhances the effects of the THC, and minimizes any unpleasant side effects (which are all dose related).   The combination has definitely been helpful already, even only a few days into all of this.

Note to self:  don’t decarboxylate everything (heat to release the active components of the flower/buds) before knowing what I’m going to use it for.    There’s definitely a learning curve.   But I haven’t felt ‘stoned’ at all (just really tired that one morning).

I made my first candy bar today with Girl Scout Cookies (strain of marijuana) and mint chips.   Turned out that my math was a little off… but if I break each section of the bar in half, I’ll have a good dose- and it’s a sativa.  I’ve had hybrids at night- and now have some indica (more relaxing and sedating).

Bottom line- I feel much more alert and intact than with opiates.  I’m still learning a lot, and I’m sure I’ll make mistakes- but marijuana doesn’t kill people.  It’s safe to adjust and test to get the right dose.   In the meantime, I’ve taken no opiates since getting my MMJ card, and have no interest in them whatsoever.   And with the MMJ, there is no interest at all in getting into the car, and risking a low speed chase 😉

Girl Scout Cookies (strain) in Guittard Mint morsels and a few drops of peppermint oil (Lorann).

First Trip to The Medical Marijuana Dispensary

After nearly four months (113 days), my IL medical marijuana card came today.  I actually cried when I saw the envelope from the IL Department of Public Health, and felt the card inside.  It’s my  last hope for effective pain relief for severe fibromyalgia, diabetic neuropathy (made worse by chemo for leukemia), degenerative joint disease, and degenerative disc disease.  I’ve been on so many different opiates, been to chiropractors, physical therapists, used TENS units, had steroid injections, yadda, yadda, yadda.   This is it.   And I’m so hopeful based on what I’ve heard from people who are using MMJ for their qualifying conditions.

I called the dispensary (MedMar) before I started over there, to be sure there wasn’t a need to have an appointment.  The guy just asked that I be there an hour before closing so they could spend time with me.   I told him I’d be there in 15 minutes !   When I got there, I walked into the lobby area, where an armed security guard was in a glassed in corner of the room.  He was very polite as I gave him my MMJ card and drivers’ license.   He’s a retired police officer, and said it was a good job.   He told me that since it was my first time there, someone would be out to get me.   And soon, a kind young man came to the door and invited me in.   We had to wait between two doors, until the door to the outside had completely closed- no chance of anybody sneaking past.  It is all very secure and professional.

It isn’t weird inside.  It’s nothing like “Disjointed”.   It’s more like an old fashioned chemist’s office than a head shop (though they had some beautiful glass pipes).   There were photos of flowers, and various MMJ terms.   It’d didn’t smell particularly “weedy”.    Nobody was stoned.

Then there was an initial interview about  my qualifying conditions… and answering my basic questions.   I explained that I’ve never smoked marijuana before, and had no experience with it.  We then went over to where all of the product is stored (lots and lots of options).   I’d told the young man that I planned to make my own edibles for the most part, and really didn’t want to smoke the weed, but didn’t mind vaping.   I ended up with  a nice assortment of concentrated oils, ‘shake’ (ground up MJ that is good for edibles like canna butter, which requires processing), edibles (chocolates and gummies), disposable vape pens, and a bit of “flower” (or bud) to use in a dry herb convection vaporizer, or for cooking.  And, I got one package of joints (5 of them) , just for the heck of it- I can always unroll them and  use the dried MJ in something else if I don’t like smoking it.  The joints are factory rolled, and a lot bigger than I expected.  I’m hoping I can put them out after a puff or two, and not end up wasting any of it.

Anyway, that’s the overview of my first trip to the medical marijuana dispensary.  🙂

Initial Impressions of Cannabidiol (CBD) Supplementation and Hemp Products

My initial  desire to apply for a medical marijuana card is for severe fibromyalgia, PTSD, seizures, and some anxiety related to health issues, as well as the complete change in my life after the death of my dad.  My anxiety is  relatively mild compared to actual anxiety disorders, but it was still noticeable.    I’ve started with CBD products as I wait for the card.    I had no idea that our bodies have an ‘endocannabinoid’ system, and there are receptors in our bodies that make cannabis usable in therapeutic ways.

Years ago, I saw documentaries about Charlotte’s Web CBD and how it transformed the life of a 6 year old little girl (named Charlotte Figi) who had 300 seizures per week and was wheelchair bound.  Since Charlotte’s Web, her seizures are less than weekly, and she’s walking and developing much more like her twin sister who doesn’t have the same seizure disorder.   I liked that there were no psychoactive properties in CBD.  It’s the THC in cannabis that is the ‘stoner’ component.   CBD is useful for pain, sleep, anxiety, and a lot more.   The possibility of getting off of some of the regular pharmaceutical products that do an iffy job (especially with pain and sleep) was something I wanted to try.   But at the time, I didn’t know that CBD oil is legal in all 50 states, and is considered a ‘food supplement’, and not a drug, so the FDA keeps their nose out of it.   It’s legal to get online !

I got some Charlotte’s Web CBD Oil (in the olive oil flavor), as well as some of their capsules a few months ago, and it took me a while to get serious about consistent dosing.  It takes some finagling of doses before the right one ‘fits’, but the best part is that there aren’t any horrible side effects if the dose is a bit too high.  I just got really tired, and my blood pressure was a little low- but that didn’t last more than 1/2 a day- and I was very aware of it, so didn’t feel unsafe (unlike the effects of many prescription meds).   The sublingual oil is a good way to get it going in the blood stream without having to go through ‘normal’ metabolism when swallowed, but the capsules are nice as a “steady” dose.   When I do get my MMJ card, CBD can be used to cut down on any unpleasant effects of THC.  (I’ve never smoked pot, so have no clue how I’ll react to THC, and plan to use ‘non-combustible’ routes of use).    It will be another learning process to find out the best combination for me, to get pain relief without feeling spacey or ‘impaired’.

Since finding the CBD dose that seems right for me, I find I’m sleeping a LOT better- more soundly, and not waking up before dawn nearly as often.  I’m ready to hit the sack, and actually fall asleep within 10-15 minutes (I take my night meds around 6-7 p.m., and am usually out cold by 11 p.m. – this from someone who used to sleep until noon after being up until 4-6 a.m. EVERY night).    The intense PTSD symptoms re: my dad’s death have also eased enough to notice.  While I still miss him a LOT, I’m not crying nearly as much, and thinking about those last horrible 19 hours, (when he was absolutely incoherent and at best only understood very short, direct comments and questions) doesn’t bring on the same sense of absolute despair.   I made the promise to him that I wouldn’t leave his side, and I kept it- only to find that the symptoms of PTSD from that last day were worse than the symptoms from a six-hour rape when I was in my 20s (that I still deal with in the form of parole protests every 3 years).    I don’t have the  almost panicky feeling like I have to plan for every contingency for self-sufficiency, now that dad is gone.

I’m also taking fewer opiates for pain  (I detest methadone- a legitimate pain med- because of the rapid physical dependence that occurs- which is NOT the same as addiction).  I still have hydrocodone for bad days- which does not have bad interactions with the CBD, though I don’t take it more than a few times a week.  I could ‘justify’ taking it more often, but I want to use the CBD  as much as possible, and avoid the opiates unless it’s just too much for the CBD alone.  When I get my card, the hope is to not take opiates at all.

I’ve been able to get off of carbamazepine (one of my seizure meds, also used as an adjunct pain medication), which has always been very hard for me.  Granted, I  started weaning before getting the Charlotte’s Web, but it made getting off of the last of the carbamazepine less  ‘mood swingy’ and emotionally labile.     Since getting off of the carbamazepine, my brain feels less foggy.  I’m back to doing a memory/hidden object game on Facebook- and feel like my synapses are firing more quickly.   Three months ago, I was flirting with the terrifying  idea that I might be seeing the initial signs of progressive cognitive impairment… or dementia.   Having fibromyalgia and a history of intense chemotherapy for leukemia has left me with some word finding issues- but I was noticing some crazy short term memory problems as well.   I never know what causes what, but it was an unpleasant situation to KNOW that something was changing in a bad way.   I still have some word finding issues (worse when actually speaking; writing is somehow easier), but the memory issues for other things seem better.

There is another route of CBD that I wasn’t sure I’d enjoy, but I really do.  It’s ‘vaping’.  For those who don’t know what that is, it’s like e-cigarettes, but with CBD oil.  My favorite doesn’t have any glycerin or glycols, and is Limoncello flavored !   It’s a very smooth, tasty ‘hit’ of CBD oil that is a small dose compared to the capsules, but it’s very enjoyable.  There is NO combustion, so no soot/ash/etc.  It’s vaporized by a %100 convection heating element, to form the vapor.   I recently got a mint flavored cartridge that is a bit more ‘herby’ but still nice.  Again- no funky additives that aren’t necessary- just the pure CBD oil, natural flavorings, and ‘terpenes’ from the hemp plant.    I highly recommend Entourage CBD vaping oils.   There is no smell in the house with vaping.   That is a huge perk.

CBD edibles are also good.  Because any type of cannabis product is carried  by fat, it’s important that the chocolates, gummies, mints, etc are made with fat, or the CBD has been processed correctly so it blends with the other ingredients.  With chocolate, fat is built in (cocoa butter).   The flavor can have a bit of a ‘skunk’ background, but I’ve found that the chocolates with mint are the best at masking any type of weed flavor.   Some CBD edibles aren’t so tasty, but there are many brands that are quite nice.  Iris makes great gummies and small chocolates in milk and dark varieties.  Hemp seeds (I like the shelled ones) taste like tiny pine nuts.  They are very small, but a couple of tablespoons has beneficial Omega oils.  I usually eat them plain, but they can be added to cereals, yogurt, etc.   Hemp oil is a good alternative to salad oils.   I get my seeds and oil from Amazon.

I got one brand of CBD oil that is a decent oil, but the flavor (chocolate mint) wasn’t strong enough to combat the ‘weedy’ undertones in a sublingual oil (that need to be held in the mouth- under the tongue- for as long as possible to increase absorption directly into the bloodstream).   I managed to salvage the bottle by making truffles out of it, with semi-sweet chocolate.  I can have a consistent dose per piece, and though I could still taste a bit of ‘funk’, it was completely doable.  I added more mint which helped a lot.

Initially, I planned to only use CBD, but in all of the reading I’ve been doing, I’ve found that some THC is desirable to increase relaxation, and make pain control more complete.  There are dozens to hundreds of strains of cannabis that have varying degrees of THC, CBD, and the other related chemicals that each have a role in the management of medical symptoms.   Each symptom can be helped with various combinations of CBD and THC, and finding the ratio for each is a process. The ‘bud tenders’ in the dispensaries are very good at knowing what active ingredients do the most for each condition.   It is very possible to minimize the THC effects so that it’s possible to function.  Of course, it’s never recommended that a person drive after ‘medicating’ (that’s how MMJ is referred to)

I’m hoping that my MMJ card gets here soon, so I can go to the dispensary and get started on what feels like the last hope for increasing my quality of life.   Hope.  That is what all of the interest in medical marijuana is about.   I don’t want to feel wasted.  I want to feel some degree of relief just living in my own body.  I have enough qualifying diagnoses, and types of pain that the idea of living a long life without some relief is not something I look forward to- so I’m hoping to have a renewed sense of peace about having a life that is worth being here for.   I am NOT in any way suicidal or not wanting to live… I just NEED some relief.   I’ve had constant pain since 1995- and all of the things I’ve tried have been moderately effective at best, but not for any length of time.

When medical marijuana first became possible in my state several years ago, my dad asked me if I’d ever consider using it.   He knew that pain was a constant reason why I was limited in what I could do.   I told him that I didn’t want to smoke it (I’d smoked cigarettes on and off from 1982 until April 2007 (when I had the blood clots in my lungs).   At that time, I had no idea what forms would be available, but of course, I’d heard of pot brownies.   My dad was a fairly conservative person, but also considered context with the medical marijuana.   I’m so glad we had that conversation.  He was OK with my decision, and even though I’m a middle-aged woman, it mattered what he thought.

The more I read, the more I learn about the incredible benefits of cannabis.  I have no interest in ‘recreational’ weed.  I want some medical stability and relief.   I want quality of life.  I want something that actually contributes to well being without the side effects that make for more problems.    I am hopeful that medical marijuana will do that.  I’m already impressed with the benefits of CBD I’ve noticed so far.