Need to Write More…Puppy-Motherhood is Tiring !

There’s something about just getting stuff out of my head, whether or not anybody reads it, but knowing that somebody somewhere is probably going to actually know what is going on in my little corner of the world makes my life seem so much less isolated.  I’ve been busy with my puppy…or should I say she’s been busy with me.  This one is a corker.  I’ve had four miniature schnauzers now, and this one has been the most challenging.  She’s very smart, very fast, and has a mind of her own. She also wags her tail at literally everything, so discipline is a crap shoot since she thinks everything is fun.   There is no association between me telling her ‘no’ and what I’m telling her ‘no’ about.  It’s just fun !  For her.  The only thing that she doesn’t like is the crate with a blanket over it. If she can’t see me, she is NOT amused.  Within a few minutes the crying starts.

Don’t get me wrong, I love her like crazy.  She’s got this look of perpetual happiness on her face. My dad says that in 20 years, when she’s been dead and gone for a few years, her tail will still wag.  After Mandy’s illness and being so ‘on guard’ the last month she was alive, it’s nice to have the upbeat energy around here. It’s also nice to be needed.  I miss being a working nurse, and somebody noticing  whether or not I am around and worth something.  Shelby needs me for her food and water, and clean pee pads. She also needs to be loved, and for me to interact with her and let her know that it matters that SHE is around. But she wears my butt out !   Some days I swear I need a net to round her up.  She has that puppy run of tucking her butt under, slicking her ears back, and just going for broke.  And she can stop on a dime. I’ve fallen once trying to avoid tripping over her.

She’s already learned quite a bit- fetch, ‘let go’ (when she doesn’t drop the fetched toy), “get on your chair”, “go potty” (she will go on command if she has to pee- or sit down and look at me if she doesn’t ), “sit”, “down”, “are you hungry?”, “do you want an ice cube?” (she loves ice on her teething-weary gums), and if I holler loudly enough, “NO!”.  She’s not really too good at “stay”.  She will come to her name being called, but sometimes it’s a ‘fly-by’ if she’s wound up and wants to play.  If there are dogs barking or cats meowing on TV, she stops what she’s doing and looks at them. If the bark sounds somewhat menacing, she joins in… it’s funny, but I’m trying to get her to know when barking is not OK (i.e. the neighbor taking out the trash…  I don’t need an alert for that).

She has little fear. She will jump from my arms, off of chairs, over toys, and off of my bed.  She’s growing, but she’s still not that big – I’m guessing about 13 pounds. We go to the vet tomorrow for the last Parvo shot, so she’ll get weighed then.  At least once during the day, she starts running like her butt is on fire, racing around tables, past chairs, down the hall, and sometimes over me (via a quick stop on my lap).  I haven’t done enough leash work with her because of the weather and my activity intolerance, but from what we have done, she’s not amused.  Though she did walk nicely on the leash last time we went to the vet for other puppy shots.

In the morning, she wakes up about 8:00 – 9:00 a.m. and wants to eat (she’s getting a gravity feeder tomorrow). I usually don’t go to bed until 2:00 – 4:00 a.m. (worked nights for a long time), and give her a puppy health biscuit before bed so she isn’t having to go too long without something in her tummy.   I get up and give her the 100gm scoop (heaping 1/3 cup) for her breakfast, and then go back to bed. She will putz around for a while, go poo, and then come back to bed with me. She likes to snuggle against my legs or back, and really is a cuddle bug when she slows down.  She seems to sense that I need to sleep and is really good about our routine.  She is very good about using her stairs to get up on the bed, and has her own bed and blankets up there, but prefers to snuggle.  She also brings toys to bed sometimes (as long as they aren’t the squeaky ones, they’re OK  🙂 ).

When I finally start moving around and she knows I’m awake, she gets SO excited. It’s so nice to be ‘wanted’ every day, and to have ‘someone’ show me that she’s glad I’m there for her.  Usually there is a fair amount of slurping on whatever part of me she can get to, and that tail literally wags too fast to actually see.  Boat motor speed.  And she’s so happy. It’s nice to start the awake part of my day with that.  Shelby can’t stand when I’m in the shower. I have to leave the shower curtain open about 8 inches so she can peek in to make sure I haven’t left her. I talk to her the whole time I’m in there, and it’s a transparent plastic curtain (but it’s green with turtles on it), so it’s not like I’m behind a concrete bunker, but to her I may as well be.

Sometimes she comes over to the recliner where I’m sitting and when I reach down to pet her, she flings herself over on her back, spread eagle, and waits for the belly rubs to commence. She has no shame. If I sit up, but reach down again, she throws herself down, and waits for more.  When she is ‘in the mood’ she will lie on her back in my arms like a baby, and doze off. She’s big enough now that with her arm in the crook of my elbow, her legs hanging off of my lap by a good 6 inches.

She LOVES her grandpa, and he loves her. She learned to climb up the couch using his inner thighs as a brace many weeks ago. Now she just takes a flying leap and gets on the couch. She can easily get on my lap in the recliner.  She loves the crazy playing with her grandpa; she’s not a prissy little girl- she’s ‘all in’ when it comes to playing. He’ll put her down in case she’s had enough and she always turns around immediately and wants more. 🙂

Last night, she walked over towards her pee pads and stopped cold. She leaned forward with her back legs planted firmly and acted like she was stalking some sort of evil prey.  I couldn’t figure out what in the world she was confronting, so went over there expecting something fierce. It was a plastic bag from her pee pads that had fallen on the floor.  Uh huh.  Go Killer!  I’ve seen her smack bugs with her paw and then eat them (yuck- but she’s too fast to pry them from her teeth), so thought that maybe it was at least something alive… nope. The dreaded pee pad bag.  Oooohhh. Gotta watch out for those !

Her curiosity is fun- it’s refreshing to see things for the first time with her.  Sometimes she does it from the safety of my arms, but most of the time she just charges in and pokes around. She does NOT like mirrors. She’s not curious about who that dog is, or why I’m over there and holding her.  I’ve got things ‘baby-proofed’, and so far she hasn’t been interested in chewing up my stuff.  She has an elk antler that she loves, as well as Nylabones for this teething that is making her kind of cranky and nippy. But there isn’t a mean bone in her. Even when she’s charging at something, her tail is going like crazy, ears are up, and a sort of ‘smile’ on her mouth… never bared teeth.  She’s just goofy !!

So that’s what I’ve been doing. I’m exhausted, but I love her.  The season change is hard with the pollens and erratic weather. We may have strong storms on Monday (possibly tornadoes), so I have more headaches and muscle pain.  I saw the pain guy last week.  Seems I got TMJ a few weeks ago, so he worked on that with a steroid injection.  I wanted to get some beef jerky, but figured my jaw would rebel… bummer, since jerky doesn’t mess up my blood sugar, and I’m always looking for protein sources that are ‘grab and go’.   I’ve been back to  reading other blogs more recently, but still miss regular updates from y’all.  Now that Shelby is playing on her own more, I can get back to writing and reading… funny how this blog world has become such an important community.  🙂

Big girl haircut !!

Big girl haircut !!

The view when I have been on the computer... Shelby brings me toys !!

The view when I have been on the computer… Shelby brings me toys !!

 

 

Into the Hands of God

Unless something extremely supernatural happens very soon, an amazing woman will be leaving this earth.  Her husband will take her hand, that he has been holding with the determination that only comes from lifelong love and endearment, and place it into the hands of God.  From there, she will enter eternity completely healed, and with a new and perfect body that she has gone a lifetime waiting to have.  And, I know the first words from God will be “Well done, my good and faithful servant….well done. Welcome home”.  She will be able to rest in the peace of our Savior and Lord, who has been perfecting His plan in her for decades.

As a Christian, I am comforted a lot by that belief.  I never really say goodbye to a Christian- more of an “I’ll catch you later”, but it’s still sad and I still grieve their physical absence. There is still a void created by the earthly loss of that person. And, yet their pain and suffering are gone. They no longer have the limitations of earth, or their physical conditions. I’ve thought about that when several people I’ve known have passed on…they don’t really ‘die’ per se…they change addresses. 🙂

The doctors have determined that my friend no longer has brain function.  In many ways, those words are even harder than someone ‘simply’ dying a physical death, since it requires decisions that no family member should ever have to make.  Her dear husband is getting another doctor to examine her, to confirm or refute the findings.  And, those of us praying are still hoping for supernatural intervention.  There is nothing too hard for God, and yet He doesn’t always choose to perform miracles when those confined to earthly knowledge want them. His plan will be perfect no matter what happens.  I might not understand His purposes now, but that’s OK.  I still believe He has things moving along to serve His purposes, and that’s good enough for me.

I’ll still cry (and have been), and I’ll still miss Mary Kay Meeker.  I’ll still pray for her dear husband Greg, that he feels some sort of peace as he gets used to a new normal for his life.  I’ll still remember all of the amazing things about MK that I know about her from the time I was a camper, and also on summer staff at Timber-lee Christian Center. We didn’t stay in touch for many years, but her impact didn’t require continuous contact. My life has been made so much better by having known her, and reconnecting this year via FaceBook. I can’t even estimate how many lives she’s touched over the years- but it’s got to be in the tens of thousands.  I first met her as a camper in 1972… I last saw her on July 14, 2012. She was as vibrant as ever, tooling around in a golf cart before coming inside, where we had some time to talk, along with Greg.  It was so wonderful to see them both, as Greg had had some serious health concerns.  I’m so thankful for that time.

So, I’m writing this while Mary Kay is still resting in that ICU bed.  I’m not going to say goodbye.  If I could, I’d let her know everything she has meant to me (and should have done so before now- there’s a life lesson in that for anybody), and how much she’ll be missed, but hold on to a table at the coffee shop in Heaven… I’ll track her down up there one day.  I’d tell her that her ability to introduce people to Jesus in a real way has sustained me during some pretty dark days. She is one of a handful of people who have made my walk with God personal. I learned a lot of ‘real life’ ways to know God.

So, Mary Kay- thank you!  Your impact in my life isn’t measurable.  You made a difference by being yourself.  You touched my life in ways that started 40 years ago, and never stopped (and won’t). You have that amazing combination of humor, compassion, and sincerity that most people don’t begin to understand.  I will miss you.  But I’ll see ya later.  God has His hand outstretched, and He’s ready to take yours when the time is right.  Just as your hand was given to Greg at your wedding, Greg will hand you back to our Heavenly Father.